The Sandlot

Recently, thanks fully in part to VH1, who are quickly becoming one of the better channels on TV, I have come to think of Ted Nugent as my hero. It started 2 Sunday's ago while me bf and ruggles were hanging out at bretts. Rugger had on Hogan Knows Best, which happened to air on VH1. Hilarious episode. So that ends and this show called Supergroup comes on. Some musical reality show where they take 5 rock legends, stick em in a house together and they have to make some songs and play a concert in 2 weeks. One of those 5 happened to be Mr. Nugent.

Now, you have to be a pretty big idiot to not know who Ted Nugent is. He created some bad-ass tunes back in the day, even if hes largely inconspicuous these days. The first time I actually witnessed his crazy glory was on an episode of "Cribs" on MTV. Dont ask why i was watching it but needless to say i saw it. Ted lives down south somewhere on this huge ranch deal or whatever where he has like 200 million guns and a hot wife. If you listen to him talk and just observe him you can tell he's clearly insane and fucking hilarious.

So we watch Supergroup. Ted spends the whole episode either jamming on his guitar, cursing, making hilarious one line quips and hitting on the hot cook they have in the house. He's money, end of story.

The later that night at home I witness more Ted on VH1. Some contest where like 6 people went and stayed at his house trying to win money and a truck and he got to vote people off after activities. Again, more crazy and commedy.

So go spin Cat Scratch Fever and remeber what Ted says; Theres 3 things in life: fucking, killing, and fucking.

So I got a new job. I've been hired by Certo Brothers Distribution as a merchandiser. Thursday I have to go out to West Seneca for orientation and a physical. Basically I will be setting up displays at stores and stocking coolers and such with beer. Pretty sweet gig, pays decent and has some perks. Still gonna work at the old restaurant but only 1 or 2 nights a week.

Speaking of the restaurant. Pops and box went out of town for the weekend on their fishing trip. So I had the extreme pleasure of running things in their absence, which explains why theres been no update for awhile. I'm so glad I graduated and have secured a different job. I more or less want to kill myself right now. Its 1107 pm on a sunday and I'm washing table clothes because we ran out and it's a holiday weekend. Bite me. Good news is I have tomorrow off and bubba is coming home.

Next update i promise will hold more excitement.

Top 5 celebs I would have my way with come hell or high-water.

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5.


Honorable mention:

Elizabeth Hurley

Hot Lindsay Lohan (not skeletor lohan)

As much as I bagged on Mind of Mencia in a previous post, I have to say that Sex and the City is a much worse show. My main problem with Mencia is just that he's not funny and its supposed to be a funny show and that people think hes funny. My issues with this "show" are much deeper.

Firstly, we have the cast, as pictured above. One wierd old-ish looking broad, show "star" Sara Jessica Parker, some other broad, and missing from the photo is the whore of the show. Well to be fair, they're all whores but in this case I'm referring to the semi-good looking blonde. Now if you ask me, a show called sex and the city should have hot girls cast as the main characters. None of the dames on this show are hot. The blonde not in the pic who I just reffered to is ok. The brunette on the right also isnt half bad. But the other two are so terrible that they negate the half hot factors of the other two.

I mean, look at the chic on the left. Who would actually want to stick their penis in that? Not this guy, not even in my most desperate of hours. I think I'd actually become gay before any thoughts of having sex with that chic krept into my mind.

As for Ms. Parker. Well, clearly she looks like a foot. See look.

All shallowness aside, more than just the cast appearance bothers me about this show. Now, I'm not just pulling all this out of my ass. I have seen several episodes of this show. Don't ask why, we're not gonna get into it. Suffice to say I've seen enough to know what I'm tlaking about. The central idea of the show is these girls who live in NYC and all of their dating/relational struggles as they attempt to find their own perfect man.

Heres where the problem begins. These girls, are whores. Loose, ugly, materialistic, sluts. All they care about is clothes, shoes, money and getting their snooches pounded on a friday night. Not that I have anything against girls who want to get boned. Its the other stuff that pisses me off because chics who watch this show actually model their own behavior after it. The show teaches girls how to be stupid, shallow whores and worse yet, that its ok to be that way.

If theres a set of qualities i despise in a woman its shallowness, stupidity and whorishness.

**For clarification, whore and slut are different concepts. Whore is a girl who goes out and does tons of guys (ie, zima). A slut is just a girl who loves the cock, but doesnt necessarily get it from a variety of sources.

So, we have some not hot girls, prancing about NYC concerned only about what kind of shoes they should buy and what guy they should fuck. Sounds like a winning show to me. Ladies, do me and men everywhere a favor, stop watching this shit-storm of a show or at least stop imitating it.

So i was driving home from work this afternoon at around 2:45 pm. The route I go through the city takes me by no less than 4 Lockport schools. Given the time I was on the road I saw all the kids who walk. Mind you these are 98% middle school kids with a smattering of elementary and high schoolers mixed in.

Now I remember when i was in elementary and middle school. I can recall with some accuracy how I dressed and acted. By no means was I or my generation perfect little angels. But holy fuck. I saw some girl, who couldnt have been more than 14, smoking.

Smoking. At 14. What the hell. The future looks bleak kids. Get out while you can.

I feel like King Arthur. Or at least the Arthur portrayed by Clive Owen in the movie King Arthur from 2004.

Arthur had a certain morality about him, a personal code if you will, that he lived his life by. He believed that other people shared his ideals and that the civilized world also shared that view. He embraced values such as honor, honesty, respect, sacrifice for the common good, loyalty, commitment, fearlessness and the belief in doing the right thing, among a host of other things.

There came a point in the film where he found out his idol, a philosopher in Rome, had been executed for his teachings on the values Arthur held near and dear. He was told by a boy that the world he thought existed, outside of the uncivilized outpost of Britain, only existed in his mind. In the end however, Arthur was rewarded for his value structure. He defeated the evil enemy, saved Britain, married Guinevere and became the king. Sure its a movie, but its historically accurate.

What's this got to do with me?

Like Arthur, I try to live my life by a certain code. Honor, honesty, commitment, loyalty. These are but a few of the values that I shape my thoughts, speech and actions around and hold myself responsible to.

Every waking moment of my life I bear witness to events, conversations and people with no such ideals. Worse yet, they embrace the values that are directly opposing of mine. Deceit, greed, dishonesty, betrayal. I see people everyday go against their word, lie and commit acts that would make me feel so horrible about myself if I was the one doing them. Apparently, you're not cool unless you lie, cheat and deceive. You won't get that nice paying job or that hot girlfriend if you're not a complete tool.

Like Arthur, I've come to the realization that the rest of the world and the people in it do not hold themselves up to a set of higher ideals. I just hope that also like Arthur, I will be rewarded in due time.

Day 3


We awoke around 9am as checkout was at 11. This is how i woke up to find Ron, upside down in a chair. Hilarious.

We spent the next 5 hours driving back to Tempe. No traffic jam and the dam this time. However along the way we saw a ton of those mini-tornado's known as sun devils. I managed to get a sweet pic of one of the bigger ones.




We stopped off in Peoria, which is about 10 mintues outside of Pheonix to meet up with Bf's buddy Butch at Hooters. Enjoyed a fine meal with some awesome storys exchanged. Then we headed off to some mall in tempe so brett could buy a cowboy hat.



We then hit up the grocery mart for some steaks and other dining necessities. Went back to the house and had a nice cookout. After that, drew and ruebz took me and brett to A-Mountain. Its nothing more than a big hill right next to ASU but its got a trail to the top and people go hang out and drink up there all the time. We took some sweet pictures for the cover of our christian rock cd too.


While we were up there we happened to have the pleasure of seeing two gay males have a long passionate make out session. Pretty gross. They weren't youre typical homo's either but rather both were thugish mexicans. After they left we sang some songs about them and how gross is was.







The view from up there is pretty sweet. Its also right near the airport so you get a lot of flight traffic. And of course, drew is bad-ass. We got lost on the way home cuz we were all drunk and ended up half way to Mexico before drew realized his error. Then we saw the cops on some manhunt with the aid of a chopper . So that was cool.

Day 4

Bf left in the morning to come back home. I on the other hand had 2 more days of adventure ahead of me. I slept in then went to this awesome mexican restaurant called Filberto's with drew and jimmy. Best burrito i've ever had. Had to take the scummy bus to get there though. Public transport is pretty awful. I spent the rest of the day in the pool and got some sun. Ended up going back in the pool later on that night and had the cops called on us. Apparently some guys jumping off a diving board catching a football at like 1030pm is just too much for some people.

Day 5

Slept in again. Went to some horrible mall out in some retarded place. Then went to a Best Buy rip-off store and got some dvds. returned back to the house after dark to eat Filberto's again then started drinking. Eventually ended up in the pool with drew, jimmy and branch playing some ridiculous game of trying to headbutt a football to eachother so each person hit it before the ball went in the water. Then i packed up my gear, watched some TV and chilled with everyone. Said my goodbyes and went to sleep around 2 or 3 cause i had to be to the airport by 830. The return flight was pretty uneventful. Thus endeth the vacation story.

So lastnight me n babies hit up the Sam Roberts concert at the Town Ballroom, formerly known as the Sphere. The show was just amazing. Add to that we got to watch the Sabres game on a huge projector (even though they lost). If you're unfamiliar with Sam Roberts you need to familiarize yourself immediatly. But this post isnt about that.

At the show i ran into this dame i had a couple classes with. She was friends with a guy i had become friends with. But she always sat near us and would partake in the conversations me and the rest of my crew would have. Now this broad is pretty good looking. Thin, blonde, my height-ish. However, during the time i had class with her i made the observation that she was just a frosty, emotionless girl. So me n babies are down on the floor by the stage waiting for sam to come on and i see these 2 girls trying to sneak by rugger on his left. I recognize the one. I do a little double-take and kinda stare at her funny till she notices me. Shes plays it off like she doesnt know me, so i look like a fool. I decide to press the issue and was like we had class together. shes like oh yea social psyche. And that was it, no further conversation, no small talk, nothing. Being that she stood near us all night, i happened to keep tabs throughout the show.

We are at a rock concert. Sam is up on stage just killing their set. The crowd energy is just off the charts. Ive never seen a more amped yet under control crowd. Everyone is singing, clapping, dancing and having what seem to be the best times of their lives. This broad is just standing there, stone faced, barely ever moving, certainly not singing, clapping or carrying on with the other thousand people in attendance. And as i look back on it, she never ever laughed or anything when we'd make jokes in class. In short, i don't think i've ever seen this girl smile or betray any outward notion of having a good time.

How can you go through life like that?

Personality is so overlooked these days when it comes to dating. I don't care how hot you might be. If you come off as this girl does i'd want nothing to do with you.

We got up at 730. I felt like shit from drinking all night but ate some cereal anyways. Finally got Ron up at like 830, who was still drunk I think. Had the SH take us to the airport to pick up the rental car. Got lost like 4 times cause finding the place was ridiculous. Finally got things taken care of and set off at about 945 in our awesome 4-cylinder dodge stratus.

Here we made our first mistake. We assumed Ron knew where he was going. We headed North on highway 17. Turns out that was the wrong way. We end up going about 2 hours out of the way and ended up in flagstaff. From there we cut over on highway 40 and headed for the Hoover Dam. Get to the dam and there's a traffic back up. Awesome. Hotel check in is at 3 and its now 4. After about 30 minutes we make it across and into Nevada. Get into the hotel about 530 after all is said and done.

When me n bf went to check in they thought we might be gay and asked if we wanted 1 bed or 2... Yea, lame. However, we got a free room upgrade and ended up on floor 50, which is 2nd from the top. So we cleaned up got dressed and headed out. We planned on eating at the ESPN zone but there was a 3 hour wait due to the bball game. So being completely starved we settle for this awful Chinese buffet where I end up eating green fish. Then we struck out for this huge arcade joint that is at the MGM. Now on the strip just all over the place are these fresh from Mexico Mexicans who are trying to hand out all this porn shit. All they do is click and whistle and make slapping noises to get your attention so you take whatever it is they're handing out. Its absurd. That said Ron and BF collected a bunch of them.

We go to the arcade for awhile. Its not as good as I remember. I call up my aunt and my cousin and they meet us down there. We walk down the whole strip to go to this patio bar which ends up being full so we go into some casino to drink and get our gamble on. I hit up some blackjack tables and come out $75 up. My other cousin and her friends meet us there and we hang out awhile more. Then we pile 9 deep into her Element and head back to the Aladdin. Gamble and drink some more there. I l0se $40 right off the bat but then win back $75, so I'm feelin great. Its like 230 and we're tired and my aunt and cousins leave. Here's where the fun starts.

I tell Ron lets go chill for awhile then I'll come back down and gamble more with him. He says fine but that he wants beer first and he's gonna go to Walgreens. BF tells him to get a chocolate milk too. We part ways. About 10 minutes later I ask BF if he gave Ron a room key. D'oh! See you can only access the top two floors from the elevator by using a room key. So Ron is fucked. Brett goes down stairs to look for him and comes back about 20 minutes later empty handed. So we go to sleep. About 15 minutes later as we're both on the verge of passing out some one knocks on the door. Its Ron and some girl. Apparently he picked her up down in the casino and after they went to the store they walked up the stairs to get to our room, knocking on the wrong door in the process on the floor above us. Ron goes n drops heat and leaves the girl with me n brett. She claims to be from Hawaii and in town for a photo shoot for Victoria's Secrets(appearing in the June issue). So Ron gets done and they leave and me n brett go to sleep at like 4. Howd he pick this girl up you ask? Here's the line he used:

Ron: Hey what are you doin?
Girl: Nothing
Ron: Yo, you wanna rock?

And it worked. Go figure. Part 3 tomorrow. As always, Pics Here

Brent and I boarded our Southwest 737 at 515pm Friday. While waiting to board in the terminal, an alarm went off. I guess it ended up being nothing but it was blaring for a good 5 minutes, not a great sign of things to come. Flight time to Pheonix was 4.5 hours. Due to the time zone change we landed at 650pm, just as the Sabres were winning OT apparently. The plane ride was pretty meh for the most part. Though a guy across the isle from me was eating some taco thing that came in a bag that proudly displayed the word "Vito's" on it. Like Don Vito. I didnt really sleep at all because anytime i drifted off something happened, like turbulance, the captain coming on the intercom or some little 5 year old who felt the need to get fresh and grab my junk. The funniest thing however was the safety manual. I picked it up out of boredom and me n BF looked through it. Aside from the ridiculous pictures of a plane crashing into a mountain or ocean and the obligatory "calm as hindu cows" fight club reference, there was on the back, pics of what you werent allowed to use on a plane. Like a radio, cigaretts, and to our delight a remote control toy car. Just imagine someone trying to play with one of those.

So we land and i call Brooke who was picking us up and she tells us where to meet them. We make our way outside and see her, ruebz and brookes friend in an SUV just rolling up. Perfect timing. We hop in on the fly and head for the house. Now let me tell you about Brooke's friend, who from here on we will refer to as the Slam Hog, or SH for short(will be explained later). This girl made santos look like the worlds best and safest driver. She was fucking nuts. Doing 90, no exageration, weaving in and out of traffic. One thing about the Pheonix/Tempe road systems. Its a complete grid layout but its always really congested. So after a harrowing 5 minute ride we get to the house. Toss our shit in, say hey to everyone, hang out for a bit. Then we go to the local grocery mart, Frye's for some food and alcohol, its Cinco de Mayo afterall.

By the time we get back to the house mostly everyone is home and the few who arent will be within the hour. Theres 6 people who live there. So we all just start drinking. We were out back and some of their friends show up, Mexi-ben( who is from LA), his gf (who is from mexico but is less mexican than Mexi-ben) and some other dude. We all proceed to just get totally shitty. Theres a mini wrestling match and other shennanigans. We also need to find a way to vegas as our ride bailed on us. We end up renting a car and have to get it at 9am the next morning.

SO drinking time is only till 2am in arizona. At like 1240, totally bombed, Ron and Brooke decide we need to go to a bar on Mill St. which is kinda like a Main St. equivelant. The SH drives us there, gets a ticket after she drops us off too. So we're waiting in line and ron just starts fucking with this guy named Chance. Hilarious. Go in, bars pretty cool. Theres some nerdy ass white dude with 2 hot black or latina girls just freaking all over him. Nothing else really, I was pretty hammered and we were only there for an hour max. So we leave, start walking to meet the SH who was coming back to pick us up. Get back and its like 230 and we gotta be up in like 5 hours so me n bf decide to go to sleep. About 30 minutes later all hell breaks loose. Its a ricter family battle. Brooke is all pissed off at drew and reuben over allegedly being called white trash so she started punching and attacking people. Ron's trying to break it all up. The screaming and fighting goes on for at least 40 minutes, its a wonder the cops didnt show up. Finally the dudes just leave and brooke is still at the house alternatly crying and telling the tale to someone on her phone. All the while me n brett tried to pretend sleep through the whole thing.

Finally we did get to sleep sometime after 3, with my phone alarm set for 730. Part 2 tomorrow live from vegas, stay tuned. Full pics Here

Hey fuckers. Just checkin in from Tempe. Vegas was pretty awsome. got a ton of pics. spent lastnight up on a mountain drinking and singing songs. Today i lounged around the pool and got some sun. I get in around 6 on wednesday. keep it real.

Well this is it kids. I leave for Arizona at 5:15. Ill be back Wednesday the 10th. The camera wont be forgotten this trip so there will be plenty of pics. I might try to squeeze an update in on sunday or monday when we get back from vegas. Drew has a computer so i'll make it happen.

Aside from that, Sam Roberts concert may 11, and i'm gonna want to see MI:3 when i get back since odds are i wont be seeing it while im gone. So someone please go with me.

Take care now, bye bye then.

There is certain events in life in which you remember exactly every single detail as to where you were and what you were doing. 1 year ago today at this time I was in my basement playing darts with teddy and ganshaw. Why would I remember such a trivial evening you ask? Something else happened that night, that's why.

One year ago tonight my grandfather passed away. I'm not much one for sentiments or dwelling on the past, but sometimes it can take a long time to realize the full impact of such an event. Tonight after work I had a beer at the bar with my dad and Skippy as we sat and reminisced. We are at the age where a lot of our grandparents have passed away or will do so shortly, and I know that everyone says that their particular grandparent was the best person ever, but in this case, when I say that it actually is true. You can ask most of Niagara county for confirmation of that fact.

He served in WW2 as a gunner in the B-17 and B-24 heavy bombers, compeleting over 50 missions. Ran several businesses in Lockport after the war before opening the restaurant including an insurance company and a dry cleaners. Beat cancer on 3 seperate occassions. Ultimatly he died from complications associated with diabetes and dialysis. Never complained a day in his life. He was the strongest and ballsiest man i've ever known.

I'll never forget the day a week or so before he died. He was in intensive care at Buffalo general. My fam and my uncle had gone to visit and he called us all in for a meeting. Said he didnt wanna do dialysis anymore and he wasnt getting anything amputated. Said dont worry about me, lets have a party.

We cannot tell what lies ahead. It may be that even greater ordeals lie
before us. We shall face whatever is coming to us. We are sure of ourselves and
of our cause and that is the supreme fact which has emerged in these months of
trial.- Winston Churchill