Shit-Puke
Warning: the following anecdote is rather gross.
It involves the discussion of bodily functions and bodily fluids. Any persons who are either offended by such topics or have a weak stomach you mighty want to skip this post. That said its rather funny in a sick sort of way so on with the show.
So i wake up bright and early at 430am, fresh off my 2 and a half hour nap. First thing I did was head to the can. Based on the fact I didnt go number 2 the night before and I ate party food at Hot Ass Guy's I knew that if I didn't S in the morning I'd get into trouble right in the middle of my shift.
So I'm working. Crawl through Tops Wrights Corners in about 2 hours, head up to Tops LP. Another 2 hours there and I feel something stirring. Shit this isnt supposed to happen. I took my precationary crap already. So I head up to Tops on Maple Rd. in Amherst. Blow through that in like an hour and realize I'm approaching the danger zone and theres no way I can hold it till I get home so I gotta bite the bullet and use a public tops restroom. Enter the commedy.
I bust in the bathroom and theres some tops employee guy in there. First the layout. Urinal to the right, stall to the left. Sink is in line with the stall on the opposing wall. I notice that hes got some cleaning tools in his hands and in the bathroom. I glance at the urinal out of habit/curiosity and I see some nasty shit at the bottom, kinda looks like vomit. Oh wait. It is. Someone puked up a ton of nasty chunky shit. Dude doesnt look too thrilled when I walk in. I head for the stall and he exits. The stall isnt much better, some piss all over the seat and such. Gotta wipe that off then lay down the bed of TP so I'm not sitting on piss. Then I drop some heat. Smelled so bad. I chuckled to myself, thinking how that kid had to come back n finish cleaning up the puke, all the while smelling the nice gift I left him.
So there it is. Mostly gross and probably I'm the only one who finds it hilarious, but fuck it.
